Settle Harriers Christmas Handicap 2024

 Yes it's  winter/Christmas handicap time again. 

The other 46 runners will all have their own stories to tell, but this is mine - mostly for my own record.  I discover afterwards is my 29th handicap.

 I needed to practice fort it. 

Practice? 

I have taken Slimming World seriously for a month and maybe lost 51b by eating lots of speed food:- Carrots, broccoli, cauliflower; and other veg. 

I have eaten shrimps to try and improve my knees _though not too happy - how many hundreds of shrimps have given their life in just one packet. 

I have listened to Michael Moseley's umpteen good podcasts and last week bought his book on sleep (though still sleeping 2 hr les a night than I should) .  - I will just get up now and do a few squats/ leg raises- should do that every hour to break up the computing. - Ouch-ouch - I am actually typing this after the Handicap race this morning and can hardly move now 

I have asked friends about Fitbit type watches and spent aeons sitting on my backside, surfing the internet looking at these. I haven't worn a watch for at least five years- since My old one broke/got lost.  My mobile phone, or living room clock suffices

Yes practice - Oh I did go on that walk -Locks to Stainforth Packhorse Bridge (See my Christmas Email)  when I found the  Riccia beyrichiana  (3 miles) and I went on the 8 mile walk to Fountains Abbey.

Well today dawned. I had been given a really good handicap this year. I would start at 9.25 - 50 minutes ahead of the next person to run and 83 minutes ahead of the person presumed to be fastest this year - Martin Holroyd who would start at 10.48

(The fastest record for the handicap is 40min 19sec set in 1989 by Chris Hirst - but the fastest people now usually take between 44 and 49.5 min.. maybe it is muddier or icier or more flooded or more rainy than it was in 1989.)

So I got up, washed my feet, cut my toe nails, stuck corn protectors onto my two left toes, put my five toe socks on under ordinary socks, Had porridge and egg for breakfast. It was going to be dry !!!!! so no need to worry about waterproofs.  

I had my walking poles ready and my "bleeper" and my packets of jelly baby type sweets. I put on my running shoes - Salomon waterproof-ish Speedcross trail - De-iced the car only needed a few squirts of de-icer - and set off for Clapham.

At Clapham I gave my self the luxury of paring in the National Park Car Park and paying £5-50 for the privilege.

Hilary Moakes was there in a jacket with a beautiful white dog - She usually runs, but today was going to walk part of it with her camera.

A car came and parked next to me an ran over one of my walking poles. fortunately it survived this.

I set off at 9.25 - no cheating by going early.

The first two fields are often flooded and result in wet feet right at the start. However some bits were slightly frozen, an the rest although soft and damp and a bit muddy were not deep under water. I deviated up hill a bit to avoid the worst bits and kept my feet dry. (Others who came later recounted tales of getting  a running shoe pulled completely off by the mud.)

Hilary and Debbie and others took photos of everyone else that can be seen here on Facebook.

It looks idyllic in the early morning light - the frost tipping the grass leaves.

But it wasn't 100% idyllic because of my bleeper going Bleep bleep Bleep 

I had set my bleeper a bit faster this year I think and it was very loud - but this kept me going and prevented me daydreaming. 

There were quite a few people out for walks so I said "Happy New Year" and "Please can you tell me the time. ?"

Half way round, at the clapper bridge above Wharf the sun came out properly - and was very very bright - may even have been a bit hot for running for the fast ones who would just be setting off  I had stated eating my jelly babies now. The river was not flooded. The puddles were all bypassable.

I passed Norber . No Waxcaps here as in one or two previous years.  I noticed one dandelion flower - too late to enter if for the BSBI New Year Plant Hunt - but a score of 1 is rather low. 

Other supporters were at Long Lane. Still no-one had caught me up -- but some people on the Long Lane could see runners in the distance descending from Norber.  As I approached the tunnels I heard steps pounding down behind me. - relief in some way that I would not be ahead of everyone. Then after a 2 min gap there were more steps and more people thundered down including two girls.

Bleep bleep Bleep I just kept going with my two poles.

at Clapham Picture by Debbie Hope

So I arrived back at the car park with a very reasonable position - maybe in the early teens.  Thank you Chris for giving me a decent handicap - and apologies if my bleeping annoyed anyone - it certainly helped me get there.

Perhaps if I had done this I would not feel so stiff now.

Jill arrives to a big welcome

Simon and John

Ah well. All done till next year.  (or maybe I should work out where they go on the summer handicap)